Monday Bear

So we all assume things to make us feel better, whether you like to admit it or not.
Example: You go to a public rest room, sit on the potty, stand up, and find a pubic hair on the seat. Of course, you assume it was yours, seeing as you didn’t see it before you sat down, and your keen eye would have noticed it, right?

Welp, this happened to me about a week ago. (And yes, you’re right, I haven’t blogged in over a week. Colleen seems to be the only complainer, though.) I went to the potty [and most of you know that I live in a dorm, so my only potty is a public (or should I say, pubic) one.]. When I stood up, I noticed a pubic hair on the toilet seat. No big deal, right? Just assume it’s yours, right? Wrong. I would assume it was mine, but egads, everyone knows Liz’s pubic hair is traffic cone orange. And not an inch and a half long. I trim that junk.
I shuttered, but then made an assumption of my own to make myself feel better: (more…)

So I’ve decided that I’m going to get my ovary pierced.  My left one though– If I got my right one done, that would mean I’m gay.

And I’m not.

Also, Sister Mary Harper is on the computer next to mine.  She is one of the few blog- witnessers that exist today.  If I make any grammatical errors (ha!) she’ll be sure to catch them.  She’s an Engrish major. (more…)

So of course Steve Irwin died.  Whoda thunk.  The guy who plays with dangerous animals was killed by a dangerous aminal.

That was going to be funny.  I made a note to blog that right when it happened, but that was last weekend, and it’s now Thursday night.  You will be pleased to know that Mattchew is giving me his old computer soon.  That means more blogtime.  That’s good news for the few people who didn’t join Holly’s Monday Bear Protesters group on Facebook.  Sonsabitches.
Things I like about school: (more…)

So I realize it’s been a while, but damn you, I’m a college woman now, and I’ve got shit to dos.

See, you can tell I’m in college, because I used “damn” and “shit” in the same sentence.� And I just fucking did it again.

Oops, I did it again.

So of course, I’m sure you’re all dying to know how my pooping schedule is since I’ve moved to a dorm.� Welp, as opposed to the usual 3 a day, I’m down to two.� That has something to do with: (more…)