So, the other day, I was thinking about what a wonderful job Kara did on my toenails. Although it was the most terribly painful thing I’ve ever endured, I’m glad I let her give me a pedicure. So as I was getting my clothes ready to take to the dry cleaners that same day, I thought aloud, “What would we do without Chinese people?” (more…)
Archive for the ‘Party over here’ Category
Those are totally bison!
Thursday, July 2nd, 2009This one’s a little short, you know how blogging affects me. In the bowel area.
Tuesday, August 26th, 2008So since tomorrow is the first day of classes, and kids tend to par-tay on those days, Matt and I decided to mix up a few cocktails and have a sad little par-tay of our own. Hilarity ensued. After having two drinks, eating a whole box of Lean Cuisine pizza rolls, a corn dog, and a mini pizza between the two of us, we decided it was time for bed. Our party was about 45 minutes long.
Bonnaroo Blog Parts One Through One,
Monday, June 23rd, 2008or Hey, Are You Going to Wizzie Man?
or Hey. Give Me Some Fucking Weed.
or Hey. Give Me Some Fucking Crepes.
I’m the freakin’ bride.
Tuesday, January 1st, 2008So my New Years resolution is to keep track of mine and Matthew’s money (ours?), because I don’t right now. And if someone were to steal my identity, I wouldn’t even realize it.
Because I’m that loaded.
Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Bride.
Tuesday, October 9th, 2007So here I am, typing muh blog, eating m&ms from this weekend’s wedding. They read “Allison and Jody” and “10/7/07″. They are the best damn m&ms I’ve ever had.
At any rate, I’m typing this on a Mac at school, because I had to check my myspace, and I thought the hipness of a Mac would counteract the lameness of the ’space.
Crazy Updates.
Wednesday, October 3rd, 2007So my cats have the fleas. Well, now it’s -had- the fleas. We took them to the vet ($174) to find out that Kitty has a heart murmur. But on the bright side, they have the cleanest ears this side of the Mississippi.
Drunken Possum
Monday, June 4th, 2007So Terrance trimmed and thinned my hair the other day. I saved all the remnants from the thinning and formed them into a huge ball. I did this for the birds, you know. They like using our hair to make nests. Especially pretty orange hair. Anywho, this is the ball:
Lizorama, more like Listorama
Monday, May 21st, 2007So this morning, Matt farted on the cat. He said go over there and sniff the cat, and see if it stinks. (more…)
More Like Badonka Don’t.
Wednesday, November 1st, 2006So geez louise, who would have thought I would have gone 2 weeks without blogging? You all have missed much pooping, concerts, etc. Welp, I could be eating lunch right now, but noes. I’m blogging for you assholes.
Oh, and if you tried to call me in the past two weeks, my mom has my cell phone. She’s mailing it back to me as we speak, though.
So here’s some stuff: (more…)
Remote Control Liz
Friday, September 1st, 2006So I realize it’s been a while, but damn you, I’m a college woman now, and I’ve got shit to dos.
See, you can tell I’m in college, because I used “damn” and “shit” in the same sentence.� And I just fucking did it again.
Oops, I did it again.
So of course, I’m sure you’re all dying to know how my pooping schedule is since I’ve moved to a dorm.� Welp, as opposed to the usual 3 a day, I’m down to two.� That has something to do with: (more…)