I saw the prettiest butterfly yesterday. I usually don’t care anything about butterflies, but I was walking around campus, and I felt it brush my arm. I turned around, and there it was in its blue and yellow…ness… ivity. I chased it around the parking lot for a good five minutes until some really pretty girl shot me a look. I didn’t think she was pretty anymore. She didn’t have a very graceful way of moving. That’s why I like spiders and snakes. It’s the dancer in me. If everyone took time out to just observe things, we would all be much happier. People ask me all the time why I’m so happy. I usually reply, “Why aren’t you?” Seriously.
I have a place to live.
I have friends.
I have good parents.
I make good grades.
I’m not starving.
I’m not dying of AIDS.
I have an amazing boyfriend who actually cares about me.
I can dance.
I guess the main reason I’m so happy is because I take time out to “smell the roses,” if you’ll excuse my cliche’. I don’t like roses, though. I like tiger lillies.
Just watch. Listen. Think. There’s so much to be happy about. And you’ll learn to appreciate the beautiful things in life. I’m pretty good about keeping in touch with my inner child (despite the fact that I’m at the ripe old age of 17… and a half…) but I don’t remember the last time I chased a butterfly before yesterday. I used to say that what I wanted more than anything else was to feel the way I did when I was 6. I got that about a year ago, and now I want to catch fireflies. I haven’t done that yet. Not since I was nine. My aunt and I caught fireflies. I kept them in a jar under my bed, then they weren’t there anymore. I think my mom threw them away.
I put a stick and a leaf in there to recreate their natural environment. If someone were to catch a human, what would they put in their jar? A piece of plastic and a computer chip? Home sweet home.
I want to go to the park. Maybe I’ll take Trixie to the park today. I would go with Holly, but she’s in Illinoi…s. I would go with Jade, but she’s camping. Everyone is on spring break. I wonder why I had to come back so soon. My house feels so empty. One of the first things Matthew said about my house when he came here was, “You don’t have much stuff.” I thought he was crazy. But I really don’t. It doesn’t really feel like home anymore. It’s time for me to move out.
Ugly men make beautiful music. Does their beautiful music make them less ugly? Ususally not, but sometimes. Like, maybe sometimes if I think about it hard enough.
So in case any of you didn’t know/ assume, I went to Matt’s house for spring break. He gave me CRAZY directions, so it took me 5 hours to get there. I was making excellent time until I got to Nashville. My first time driving in Nashville, the traffic lights went out because of the storm. Meanwhile, this part of the state was being destroyed by tornadoes. Dan called me to make sure I was okay. That was nice of him. Alley Jo called me to pick up something at the Hustler store for her. I forgot to tell her I didn’t have any money.
But I got there, and there was a living room full of people. Matt told me that his mom hated me. I thought she did until I met her. We got along suprisingly well. On the days that Matt had class all day, we went shopping. And we watched TV. And we talked about Matt. I learned alot about him that I didn’t know. I’m really glad she raised him the way she did. I have alot of respect for her.
His sister Colleen is a year or 2 younger than I. I was very curious as to how well we were going to get along. Matt was right… she’s just like him, except social. We got along very well. We went to Goodwill together one day while Matt was at school and Ms. Terri was taking nap. She loves chicken. I had no idea that there was such thing as Mrs. Winner’s, but there are two of them in Hermitage, TN alone.
So on the way to school with Matt, I was reading his tests in the floorboard of his car. His answers crack me up. “He got his leg eaten by a shark.” “Go realtors go.” And the ones that he kind of knew, he put a question mark after. “War honour?”
And I’m not supposed to blog that he’s allergic to menstrual fluid. So… MATT ISN’T ALLERGIC TO MENSTRUAL FLUID.
Just for the record, that has nothing to do with me. And it also has nothing to do with sex. I just refuse to tell the story for the sake of my life.
Oh, and I met his grandparents. They’re really nice. I think my hair colour got me in good with them. They have a pet ferret. I want one.
I also want one of those pet alligators like Clarissa had in her closet. His name was Elvis. She kept him in a little swimming pool.
I think on Grood Friday, Zeffer and I are going Malling. Maybe for some swimming pool cheese, too. Girls love cheese, you know. I miss her. I haven’t seen her in months.
I have so many friends who live far away. My only really convenient friends are Steve and Holly. Holly’s mom lives a block away. Steve is also walking distance.
I have a hard time getting to Ashley’s house. It takes about 20 minutes.
Jade lives waaay waaay waaay out. About 20 minutes as well.
I’ve never been to Zephyr’s house. She usually comes over here. But that takes about an hour and a half.
Dan and Lia live about 11 hours away. I only get to see them 2ish times a year.
I’ve lost track of pretty much everyone else.
Remember when Jessica and I used to be friends? We aren’t enemies any more, we just… you know. Don’t talk. We’re all going to Florida. Ashley, Liz, Holly, Jessica. I can’t forget my sunscreen.
I don’t know if Jade and I are going to NYC. I have a feeling we won’t.
They’re putting the nose back on the sphynx.
I had nightmares about ghosts two nights in a row.
Remember the dream I had where I won the Miss America Pageant with a lobster suit? That was crazy. I’m so hot.
I need batteries for my camera and other things.
I need to unpack.
I only pooped 4 times while I was at Matt’s house. That’s not healthy.
Jessica only poops once a week. And when she does, it’s just a little bit. Once she pooped at my house, and I felt honoured.
Like when Davey Jones used Rosie O’Donnell’s bathroom. Except better. Because Davey Jones uses the bathroom all the time.
Davey Jones’s Locker. I bet he has a mirror and one of those nifty shelves in it. I had a locker mirror in the 7th grade. Then one of those mean girls broke it. It was in the shape of a butterfly.
So in conclusion, hows that for your full- circle ending?