Monday Bear

So I had this other dream.  This one was about Lia.  She was in my dorm next to the elevators, and her ass was HUGE.  Really, really huge.  Like, unnatractive huge.  And she was wearing one of those long denim skirts like the pentecostal chicks wear.  But I snuck up behind her and grabbed it anyway.

I grabbed it real good.

I’ve decided to try to stop saying “like” unless I’m comparing two items.

I’ve also always thought that if one highlights a letter and types the “shift” key, it should capitolize the letter.  It doesn’t.  It’s always made sense to me that it should.  Since my early computing days in kindergarten on the green and black (and sometimes red) souped up Etch-A-Sketches playing Math Racer.

But really, all Math Racer was was 100 math problems (addition, subtraction, multiplication, division, or mix) next to a picture of a car.  And if you finish all 100 problems, you win the race.

Speaking of which, here’s a picture of me at the canal the other day.  I look HUGE.  I’m really not fat at all.  But I look HUGE in this photo.

Matt was at a weird angle in the photographic process.  Poke as much fun as you like.

Just to keep people from thinking that college has gotten the best of me, here’s a photo of me looking hot.  One can clearly see that my arms are -not- huge and I -don’t- have backfat.

That scarf makes me look like a fag.  But I like it.  It was Aunt Rosie’s back in the day.  Way back in the day.  And those painted cinder blocks are the inside of my dorm room.

You  know why I have alot of pictures of myself?  Because when I think I look hot, I do a self-photography session.  Then, when I don’t have any self- esteem left, I look at how hot I am sometimes most of the time.

But after tomorrow, I’ll have hot pictures of me in my -fabulous- vintage 1940’s pinup bathing suit.  Mee.Yow.

One time in high school:

“Will you guys tell me if I ever get back fat?”
-Heather

Look at me, typing that like I was popular in high school.  Well, I was popular.  Like everyone knew me and liked me.  But I didn’t hang out with the popular kids, and I wasn’t invited to get ready with other girls before homecoming dances.  Probably because I didn’t -go- to homecoming.  I think Holly was more popular than me.  Much more.  But still, people liked me.

Man, I didn’t like many other people besides her in my high school.

So you may be wondering why I haven’t been blogging about that beautiful girl in Matt’s art class.  You know, the tiny one with perfect skin and who is probably very talented and much cooler than I’ll ever be?  Welp, I haven’t been blogging about her because I’ve overcome my insecurities and am no longer jealous of other beautiful girls to whom Matthew may be attracted.

.

(actually she’s in canada for the semester.  but i’m really not that jealous anymore.  seriously folks, it’s been a year)

Also, Alley Jo.  Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.  -sigh-.

And “with a horn thrown in for good measure” as the lady on the safari tape would say, here’s a bad picture of Colleen:

Actually, it’s not really that bad.  She’s just wearing jogging pants.  She got her hair cut, by the way.

So in conclusion, I’m a horrible storyteller, but I find that it comes out much more nicely if I write it out on a piece of computer.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007 at 11:08 PM and is filed under Dreams, Language, School, Travel. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.