So what is the coolest thing one can do?
Everyone knows that I want to me an ob/gyn or a midwife. I just began interning at the hospital today in Labour and Delivery. When I got into the OB, it was dead, so I feared that I would be all day doing paperwork. Then a girl called and said that she was having some discomfort and that she needs to come by. There was also a girl in a room who had gone into labour, but she had just had an epidural and wasn’t expected to deliver until 7 or 8 tonight.
She called a nurse in there to tell her that her epidural wasn’t working, so we called another anesthesiologist to come redo it. When he came up to the OB, I introduced myself, so he invited me to come assist with the epidural, about which I was superpsyched. We got in there, and WOW. I have never seen such a big needle before in my life. It was (no exaggeration) the size of an ink pen cartridge. That chick was tough. She barely whimpered. Before we went in there, she was dialated to 5 cm. After the epidural, she was 8 cm. Then we had to take a little bit of the cathater out, and after that, she was fully dialated, so we asked her to push a little bit while the nurse was still in there, and she felt the baby drop. Then the nurse said, “Liz, get the stirrups. We’re going to have a baby.”
I said, “WHAT?!?”
So I put her legs in the stirrups and away we went.
We called Dr. Tru in there, and I was taking care of her until he got there. Her uterine plug came out, which probably would have grossed me out if I wasn’t childbirth- lovin’ Liz. Imagine a huge bloody loogie… yeah.
So then Dr. Tru came in, and while he was preparing everything and putting on his galoshes (childbirth can be very messy), he was trying to talk to her about a tubal ligation, but she just responded with grunts and such, so he decided to not talk about it anymore.
He performed an episiotomy, and we had her push once, and the baby immediately began to crown… I was floored and began to tear up. I told her, “You’re doing a great job! Push!”
She replied, “I can’t!” and took a breath in. The baby prairie dogged a little bit. I had never witnessed a birth, but the baby didn’t seem to be wriggling around any, so I thought, “Oh my gosh. This baby is dead.” But then I realized, “Wait a minute. This kid is in a vagina. He doesn’t have any room to be wriggling around.” So I yelled, “Yes you can!” and the baby’s beautiful little head came out, followed by the shoulders, and seconds later, Dr. Tru handed me a beautiful baby boy, Noah. I burst in to tears as I wiped off his pretty little face and laid him beside mom.
Dad cut the cord and I noticed he was crying. We delivered the placenta, which wasn’t half as gross as I anticipated. All of the pictures of I had seen looked like bloody stuff that cats have coughed up… attached to a cord. This was actually not that bad… I poked it and it felt like… brownie batter in a bag.
So after we delivered the placenta, I took Noah, weighed and measured him, (7lb 8oz, 19 in), and then I took him to the cleaning table, where as I was cleaning him off, he took his first piss on me… it was awesome : )
I gave him to the father and walked out of the delivery room… the other interns were waiting for me outside, saying, “I hate you, Liz!” They were sooo jealous… even Brad.
I went to ballet and told Mrs. Sacch… she thought that that was -the- coolest thing ever. It totally was.
My hands still smell like latex gloves and hospital soap : )
If you want to be a midwife, you need to get on over to “The Farm” in Summertown TN. They are famous for thier midwifery. Seriously.
Keep practicing.